Late Neurodiversity Diagnosis and Why It Matters to Me

The ADHD was less of a surprise – there’s a strong thread of heredity with neurodivergence, and when you know what to look for, my family has that pretty well covered.  But still – full blown ADHD? Me? My brain may run on full power all the time, but for a variety of reasons, my body definitely doesn’t.

The dyslexia was more of a puzzle; I’ve always loved reading, and devouring books – but had my own secret quirky way of reading that I somehow felt was improper and unmentionable in polite society – I was, simply, reading “wrong”.  This great blog post “Stop saying dyslexics can’t read!” by Deborah Leveroy[1] really helped me to see things differently.

I think that’s been the value of being diagnosed at such a great age and stage.  There are aspects of my life where I am – different – to others.  I know we’re all on a spectrum, but my emotional volatility can now be ascribed to ADHD sensitivity and openness to emotions, high and low[2].  Sleep disorders are common to those with a racing mind[3], alongside lower vagal tone[4] – which is a really important indicator of happiness and mental health according to the Happiness research I’ve been doing[5][6].  My chronic inability to find my keys, and my laughably poor short-term memory- these come down to a struggling executive function hamstrung by naturally lower levels of dopamine, rather than moral failings.  If only I just tried a little harder – it still would not make a difference.

I really did do a PhD at Cambridge University because I was the stupid child of the family.  From a personal perspective, I discovered that neurodiversity is often found alongside chronic pain[7] and joint hypermobility[8], both of which feature heavily in my life.  Trying to explain to occupational therapists that I struggle with pacing – now I can offer an explanation that they might actually listen to.

I have dug more into the ADHD literature than the dyslexia, so far – typically, I now understand, as it felt like getting a quicker fix.  I don’t entirely understand how the dyslexia and ADHD interact, but I am learning that if you have one neurodiversity, it’s not uncommon to have more.  What can I say? Terms I’ve come across are “neurospicy” or “neurosparkly”…

“but I am learning that if you have one neurodiversity, it’s not uncommon to have more”

I think I’m probably unlikely to change my behaviour much – I’m an old dog to learn new tricks- but I have picked up some new ideas that have really helped in terms of managing belongings and the like.  What’s been so much more important to me is that I’ve stopped beating myself up about all the things that are wrong with me.  They all seem to be explained by neurodiversity – I’m not faulty, I’m just different.  It’s not a great rallying cry, but it means the world to me.